


Dear Dan

by orphan_account



Category: Amazingphil - Fandom, Danisnotonfire - Fandom, Phan, Video Blogging RPF
Genre: :((., Angst, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Letters, Love Letters, M/M, Phil wants him back bad, Post-Break Up, Sad, Sad Ending, They broke up and it didn't go well for either of them, so much angst!!, suicidal!dan
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-07-14
Updated: 2016-07-14
Packaged: 2018-07-24 00:00:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 349
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7485039
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Phil writes Dan letters.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. One

 Dear Dan,

The fans always

think,

that I'm happy, and

you're sad.

They got part of it

right, 

you are sad.

You don't talk to anyone

about it,

and you haven't told

me, 

but it's obvious that

you are.

But nobody thinks that,

happy little Phil

isn't as happy as

he seems.

Well maybe that's

because

I'm just better at

hiding it,

than you,

and nobody ever

asks.

Love, Phil


	2. Two

Dear Dan,  
You left me alone  
for a while today.  
I didn't know what to do  
and I was afraid  
of myself,  
I was shaking,  
on the bathroom floor.  
I'm not sure how  
I ended up there,  
but I did.  
It was terrifying,  
and all I could think of  
was,  
what if you got  
in a crash?  
Ran away?  
Killed yourself?  
When you came home,  
I had fell asleep.  
I was still  
dreaming of you.  
Love, Phil


	3. Three

dear dan,

i have decided

to stop using caps

because it's too much

work and my hands

hurt from writing to you.

but i still will,

of course.

i won't ever stop.

until i'm dead.

you'll never see these anyway.

love, phil


	4. Four

dear dan,  
you went out  
with someone   
today.  
you seemed so  
happy, excited,  
i just smiled and  
said  
'have fun.'  
you came home   
around two am,  
drunk as hell, and   
i put you in bed,  
got you tylenol and water,  
and once you feel asleep,  
i told you   
you deserved anybody  
but me.  
i hope they make you happy.  
you didn't specify gender,  
but whatever they are,  
they deserve you.  
love, phil


	5. Five

dear dan,  
it's been a couple  
weeks since my last  
letter.  
you still haven't  
seen any,  
and i've been  
getting better,  
but i still fucking love you.  
i won't ever stop loving you.  
you go on dates twice a week  
now, with that person.  
you seem so happy.  
i learned it's a female,  
and her name is marlee.  
you showed me a picture,  
and she's beautiful.  
you said you want to   
keep her forever.  
and i said do it,  
but that night,  
i couldn't stop crying.  
love, phil


End file.
